Good morning Hank; it’s Friday, January 12th.
If you’re wondering why I’m drinking a beer in the morning, it’s because it’s 12:15 in
the morning; I have to get up early tomorrow, so I’m doing the vlog tonight. If you’re wondering
why I’m drinking light beer instead of regular beer, it’s because I’m doing Weight Watchers.
I don’t like Weight Watchers. I’m tired of eating popcorn. They don’t give you enough
points! I need more points! This video blog post is going to consist entirely
of ideas. Misprinted business card utilization ideas: if you had a hole punch, a lot of patience,
and a lot of dental floss, you could make Katherine a dress. You could eat them while
discussing the political situation in Kenya. Since you just got married, you can use them
to write very terse thank-you notes in very small handwriting. You could wallpaper every
room in your dollhouse. Everybody thinks you have a dollhouse now! Punishment ideas: I’m just going to pick punishment
ideas from things that are currently in our living room. Several of our books would make excellent
punishments. This is The Continuum History of Apocalypticism. It’s eleven-hundred pages
long. It’s pretty punishing. The person who fails to update has to send
out a Christmas card next year, and the Christmas card has to include the picture of a baby,
someone else’s baby. Maybe Emmitt Cloud’s baby. The person who fails to update has to knit
a scarf. That would suck. The person who fails to update has to eat
one styrofoam peanut. And finally: Don’t you think it would be a
good punishment if you had to do your Happy Dance for three minutes and thirty seconds,
but you could only do it at five second clips at a time, so you had to have a total of…
ah jeez, it’s too late to call Daniel, hold on. 70? I think? 70 dances in 70 different locations?
That’d be a pretty good punishment. Or maybe that should be a project? Maybe we could intersperse
our Happy Dances. You do 35, I do 35. That has some appeal for me, any interest?